Over the past thirty years of working with women, I have noticed something. When I invite a woman to place her hands on her breasts, there is often a moment of hesitation.
Some laugh nervously.
Some become emotional.
Some realise they have never intentionally touched their own breasts with kindness before.
Not to check for a lump.
Not in the shower.
Not because someone else wanted to.
Just because they wanted to offer themselves a moment of care. That pause says so much. Because our relationship with our breasts is rarely just about our breasts. It is about how we see ourselves as women, about the stories we have carried for years. It is about the ways we have learned to judge, hide, compare and sometimes even reject this deeply feminine part of ourselves.
More than breasts
Our breasts are one of the most visible symbols of womanhood. Long before we become mothers, they shape how we feel about ourselves. Society tells us they should look a certain way. Be a certain size, sit a certain way.
Not too small.
Not too large.
Not too soft.
Not too different.
Very few women ever feel they measure up, so many women carry quiet shame around their breasts. Others carry grief.
Grief that they couldn’t breastfeed.
Grief after pregnancy loss.
Grief that motherhood didn’t unfold as they had hoped.
Or grief from years of believing they somehow weren’t enough.
Our breasts become the place where so much of this is held.
They are symbols of nourishment
Our breasts nourish life, not only through feeding a baby. They symbolise comfort, safety, tenderness, compassion, the ability to love. But nourishment was never meant to flow in only one direction.Many women have become incredibly good at nurturing everyone else.
Our children.
Our partners.
Our parents.
Our work.
Our communities.
And yet we quietly neglect ourselves.
Our breasts ask a gentle question.
Who is nourishing you?
Because the woman who is always giving eventually forgets how to receive.
The feminine wound
One of the deepest wounds many women carry is the feeling that they have somehow failed.
Failed because birth didn’t go to plan.
Failed because breastfeeding was difficult.
Failed because pregnancy ended too soon.
Failed because they never became mothers.
Or simply failed because they have spent years trying to be everything to everyone and still don’t feel enough.
These beliefs settle quietly into the body, not as punishment, but as stories waiting to be seen with compassion. Breast cancer is a complex disease influenced by many factors, including genetics, hormones, lifestyle and environmental exposures. Yet many women who have experienced breast cancer also speak of profound emotional journeys around identity, caregiving, grief and self-worth.
This isn’t about blame, it is about recognising that our emotional wellbeing matters too, our bodies are not separate from our hearts.
The left and the right
Many wisdom traditions see the breasts as carrying symbolic meaning. The left breast is often associated with our inner world.
Our emotions.
Our ability to receive.
Our relationship with ourselves.
The right breast reflects how we express ourselves in the outer world. How we balance giving and receiving, how we navigate expectations, responsibilities and what the world asks of us.
Whether these symbols resonate with you or not, they invite beautiful reflection, where am I giving too much?
Where have I forgotten myself?
Where am I longing to be held instead of always being the one who holds everyone else?
Coming home to yourself
This is why I created the Breast Health Journey.
For the past four years it has been known as the Breast Health Challenge.
But it has never really been about a challenge, it has always been about coming home, for 21 days, we spend just two minutes a day together.
A gentle breast massage.
A conscious breath.
A quiet moment of listening.
Not because your body needs fixing.
But because she deserves your attention, because your breasts deserve love rather than criticism, because your body deserves to know she is safe, because every woman deserves to feel at home in herself.
Before you finish reading…
I’d love you to pause for a moment and ask yourself:
- How do I really feel about my breasts?
- When was the last time I touched them with love rather than fear?
- Am I constantly nourishing everyone except myself?
- Do I believe my worth depends on what I do for others?
- Where have I disconnected from my own feminine wisdom?
Don’t rush to answer.
Simply notice what arises.
Your body often knows before your mind does.
I’d love you to join me tomorrow evening
Tomorrow night I’m hosting a free Zoom conversation where we’ll explore breast health through a different lens.
Yes, we’ll talk about caring for our breasts physically, and we’ll also explore the emotional, symbolic and deeply human relationship we have with this sacred part of our bodies.
If you’ve been feeling the quiet nudge to slow down, reconnect with yourself and begin listening to your body with more compassion, I’d love to welcome you.
Perhaps this isn’t just about your breasts, perhaps it’s about remembering the woman you’ve always been beneath the expectations, the roles and the endless giving.
And perhaps that remembering changes everything.
Here is link to register and if you aren’t able to be with us live, you will be sent a recording. https://luma.com/5t5cu7t8
Sending you a BIG hug
Theoni