For this week’s blog, I want to talk about our language.
Not the one we speak with words, but the one we speak with our bodies.
Touch is our first language.
Think of a newborn baby.
What do we instinctively do?
We touch them. We hold them. We stroke their skin. We cuddle them.
That touch, it speaks of love.
It tells the baby: you are safe, you belong, you are wanted, you are loved.
It regulates their tiny nervous system. It helps them settle. It helps them grow.
Touch is how we first experience connection.
When we’re little, in nursery school, we hug our friends, climb all over each other in play, hold hands, roll around, giggle, snuggle. It’s so natural. So human.
In many indigenous cultures, this remains true for life.
Touch is constant, across ages, relationships, and moments of daily living.
Physical connection is part of the fabric of being together.
But in our Western culture, we’ve complicated things.
We’ve created rules and labels: what’s appropriate, what’s not.
And slowly, as we grow, touch becomes something we second-guess.
By the time we start school, we’re already learning to filter:
“Can I hug you?”
“Is this okay?”
“What will people think?”
We begin to doubt something that was once so instinctive.
For me, one of my love languages has always been physical touch.
Not just from my partner, but from bodywork. From safe, loving, honouring touch.
My love affair with bodywork began at the age of 20.
The first modality I learnt was aromatherapy, working with essential oils, hands, and intention. Then came reflexology… and over the years, I explored and trained in many other forms of healing touch.
Now, after decades of practice, I know this deeply:
Touch is essential. Especially for women during pregnancy and in the postpartum period.
And it’s equally important for all women and mothers in particular, to receive.
We give so much of ourselves, constantly. Our energy, our care, our presence, our bodies.
Receiving loving touch allows us to replenish. To come home to ourselves. To be held, just as we so often hold others.
To be touched with care, with presence, with honour, is not a luxury. It is a need.
It helps regulate the nervous system.
It softens the muscles, calms the mind.
It brings a sense of being held.
And that sense of safety is passed on to the baby, too they feel it.
So I ask you gently:
When last did you feel safe and lovingly touched?
Touched with care. With respect. With reverence.
It is so important that we make time to receive.
I am endlessly grateful for Kahuna massage, a practice that embodies all of this.
It is a loving, sacred, intuitive touch.
It respects the vessel we live in our body, in all its seasons and needs.
Some days, we need deep pressure.
Other days, we need to be held lightly.
What matters most is presence, the ability to feel into what is needed.
After 30 years of working with women, I know how to offer this kind of safe space.
I know how vital it is.
So again, I ask:
When last did you receive loving touch?
If it’s been a while, book an appointment today.
If you’re not in Johannesburg, I’ll be in Cape Town this June and would love to see you there.
And if you’re elsewhere, reach out, I’m happy to recommend someone trusted in your area.
Because in this age, in this time, in this life,
Women deserve to receive.
With love,
Theoni