This week I want to speak into overwhelm. Grab a cup of tea.
Overwhelm is a sensation.
An experience.
And it is one I am hearing about more than ever, recently.
Last month I asked past and current clients to fill out a Postpartum Survey so I can understand what their needs and desires were to support women in that season of life.
What stood out the most?
Hands down, the biggest emotion women named was overwhelmed.
Then I spoke to another client, overwhelmed.
Then another conversation, overwhelmed. In all honesty it taken me 2 weeks to be happy to send this blog, wanting to do it justice and add value to you the reader.
And if I’m honest, it is something I have experienced too.
So let’s explore it.
Overwhelm is when too many things are happening at once.
Or when what is happening is asking more of you than you have the capacity to hold in that moment.
Emotionally. Mentally. Spiritually.
It’s simply too much.
It’s system overload.
In Atlas of the Heart, Brené Brown speaks about stress and overwhelm as places we go when things are uncertain or too much.
Because it means we are not broken.
We are somewhere.
She shares a description from Jon Kabat-Zinn, who describes overwhelm as the all-too-common feeling:
“that our lives are somehow unfolding faster than the human nervous system and psyche are able to manage well.”
Pause with that.
Our lives unfolding faster than our nervous systems can manage.
Of course we feel overwhelmed.
If stress is rain, overwhelm is a flood.
Overwhelmed means an extreme level of stress and emotional and/or cognitive intensity to the point of feeling unable to function.
And I love this definition from Merriam-Webster:
“Completely overcome or overpowered by thought or feeling.”
We all know that feeling.
It washes over you.
And suddenly you are completely unsure what to do next.
Even when someone gently asks,
“How can I help?”
“What needs to be done?”
Organised thoughts feel impossible.
This is also when we can be incredibly hard on ourselves.
If I had the wherewithal to figure this out, if I knew what comes next, I wouldn’t be walking around in circles, crying, talking to myself.
Feeling stressed and feeling overwhelmed seem to be deeply connected to our perception of how we are coping with our current situation.
Can I handle this?
Am I coping?
Am I inching towards quicksand?
Overwhelm speaks directly to capacity.
Capacity is not fixed.
It can be built.
Through yoga. Through breath. Through a daily practice. Through creating space inside yourself.
If you do not currently have a personal rhythm in the morning: meditation, breathing, stretching, praying, journaling, I would gently suggest you begin there.
Not to eliminate overwhelm.
But to expand your capacity to meet life.
Because here is the truth.
We are not designed to multitask at the level modern life demands.
We are not built to hold everything at once.
And in the world we are living in. the pace, the information, the expectations, overwhelm feels more prevalent than ever.
So when you are in the thick of it, start here.
Slow it down.
Bring yourself back to yourself.
Slow your breathing.
Feel your feet on the ground.
Come into the present moment.
Then ask yourself:
What is actually needed of me right now?
Not everything.
Not the whole week.
Not the entire future.
Just now.
Overwhelm also speaks to belief systems.
Do you believe that in order to be successful you must constantly achieve?
That in order to be a good mother you must do everything?
That being busy equals being worthy?
Sometimes overwhelm is not about the tasks. It is about the story underneath the tasks, and stories can be changed.
There is also a deeper layer.
Control.
Often overwhelm is tangled up with the need to control, and control usually shows up when we do not feel safe.
When we don’t feel safe, we grip tighter. We try to manage everything and we stop trusting.
But if you can cultivate trust, that life is unfolding as it needs to something softens.
You don’t have to control every outcome. You don’t have to hold the entire future in your hands. You can meet this moment.
Just this one.
Overwhelm, safety, control, trust they are all connected.
So perhaps the question is not just
“How do I get rid of overwhelm?”
But
“Where do I not feel safe?”
“Where am I not trusting?”
“What support does my nervous system need right now?”
Because sometimes the answer is not to do more.
It is to slow down enough for your nervous system to catch up with your life.
One breath.
One task.
One moment of trust.
And then the next.
This is exactly why spaces matter.
Because overwhelm is not something we think our way out of.
It is something we soften through.
These are the very things we explore in my monthly women’s circles.
We slow down.
We listen to the nervous system.
We untangle the beliefs underneath the busyness.
We practise trust.
We expand capacity, together.
And this is also the work that unfolds when you receive Craniosacral Therapy from me.
We create safety in the body.
We allow the nervous system to settle.
We give your system space to catch up with your life.
Gently.
Respectfully.
Without force.
You do not have to hold it all alone.
Sometimes the most powerful step is allowing yourself to be supported.
Click below to connect, or save this for when you need me.
Theoni