On 10 May we will celebrate Mother’s Day – a day meant to shine a light on and express gratitude for the enormous and beautiful role that mothers – biological or otherwise – play in the wellbeing of us all. May is also a month dedicated to Maternal Mental Health and recognises International Midwives’ Day on the 5^th, and International Nurses Day on the 12^th. For me, what links these together is the notion of care – for others, our families, as well as care for ourselves. And the need and openness for each of us to both offer and receive care when required.

Post-natal depression (PND) is real and prevalent, and it varies from woman to woman. The 9-12 months after birth are as critical for the health of both baby and mother as the period of pregnancy and birth. Support during this time is vital to enable a space where mother and baby can really connect and find themselves in their developing dance with one another. And strength for you as a mother does not only mean your ability and tenacity to do and be everything for your baby and your family, but it also means asking for – and accepting – help and holding when you need it.

Now more than ever we need to remain steady and centered within ourselves, as women and as mothers. As the world has and will continue to change, we need to embrace the change and pivot ourselves to what and where we are needed. As mothers, we attend to so much. It is who we are. So start to acknowledge and celebrate yourself – you are doing an amazing job right now! There are so many things you’re required to complete, for work, child/ren, and partner to tend to, and all that comes with that, including all of the unseen and often unthanked for tasks. Now is the time to appreciate yourself – because it all starts with the person in the mirror. Be there for yourself. And also be aware of the narrative going on in your head while you’re busy doing what needs to get done. What are you telling yourself? Are you affirming or being critical of yourself? Become aware of when your mind’s narrative is not generous to who and what you are, and then begin to tell yourself a new story. Your mind is listening and waiting for instruction! If there were no limits and no perceived obstacles, what would you be telling yourself? Start to imagine what is possible for you.

During the time of this pandemic, think of yourself as if running a marathon, rather than a sprint. Prepare yourself as best you can, and be practical in how you approach what needs doing. Be patient, kind and realistic – to yourself and others. Ask for help and reach out when you need to.

As women and mothers, we are the light and the centre of our homes, and right now we are at home probably more than we have ever been before. So find ways to centre and uplift yourself, and in doing so, you will also be centering and uplifting your family.

Here are a few simple things you can do:

1. Make time to formally breathe for a few minutes each day.
2. When you feel your mind going into a downward spiral, bring yourself back to the present moment, and check-in with your story.
3. Here. Now. Connecting with your breath and your body.
4. Use pure essential oils to uplift and inspire yourself, and your family.
5. Move your body every day: walk, do yoga, stretch, and dance!
6. Play uplifting music.
7. Wherever possible, choose whole, fresh foods over processed options.
8. Drink lots of water.
9. Take time to meditate.
10. Write a gratitude diary before bed.

We are all feeling a wide range of emotions over this time – uncertainty as to what is to come, and insecurity about the future. All of these emotions have the ability to create anxiety and fear in us. But try and see these emotions for what they are: they are energy in motion. Allow yourself to be in this moment, and sit with whatever you are feeling. Don’t put it off till later. Sit with what those feelings are now, and feel the sensations in your body as they arise. Stay close to them. After a time, these feelings will shift. Keep doing this a little at a time when emotions arise for you.

And then remember, the 29^th of May is National Biscuit Day! (*Yay!*) A timely reminder that you’re also allowed – and need – to treat and enjoy yourself in amongst all your other ‘doing’!

I am available via Zoom and on WhatsApp when you want to reach out. I am also available Mondays and Fridays on my Theoni Papoutsis Birthkeeper Facebook page for Q&A at 1030am All are welcome, with any questions covering pregnancy, motherhood, and womanhood.

Be gentle and kind with yourself.

– Theoni