This week’s blog is about presence.
And I think all of my work, in one way or another, focuses around presence. Presence is the real estate of being and it is something that needs to be practised.
So much of our time is spent in the past, worrying about what could have been, what we should have done differently, what happened and why.
And so much of our time is spent in the future, worrying about what is going to happen, what might happen, what we need to prepare for.
And that is where we can create so much anxiety.
When you are doing a task, do you find yourself already going towards the next thing? You are eating, but thinking about what you need to do afterwards. You are with your children, but thinking about the next thing on your list. You are working, but already thinking about what comes next.
And then we miss the moment we are actually in.
Bringing yourself back to the moment is one of the best ways to be in the moment.
And perhaps this is one of the reasons we need to slow down.
As women, we know we need to slow down, because so much of life is happening right now.
Not the next step, not when we figure things out, not when everything is sorted.
But right here. In this moment.
So where is your attention being pulled?
What am I trying to hurry past?
What does this moment feel like right now?
And what would it mean to be fully present?
Sometimes the hardest thing is to be present when we are dealing with an uncomfortable situation or an uncomfortable season in our life. We don’t always want to be present to what is. We want to move through it, or even past it.
Fix it.
Change it.
Get to the other side.
But presence gives us another option.
It allows us to notice what is happening, to notice what has happened, to notice our emotions, to notice what is happening in our bodies.
So that we can respond instead of react.
Presence in my work
This is a valuable tool that I have found in my own life, bringing myself back to presence.
Whether I am holding a women’s circle, whether I am with a woman in labour, helping a postpartum mama, or holding a woman or baby with craniosacral therapy, I bring all of myself into that present moment.
Nothing else is as important as that woman.
Or that circle.
Or that moment.
I am not thinking about the next thing.
I am not somewhere else.
I am there.
And I think this is one of the most powerful things we can offer another person.
Our presence.
To really be there.
To listen.
To notice.
To feel.
To be with what is happening rather than rushing ahead.
Manawa, now is the moment of power
In the Kahuna principles, there are seven principles.
One of them is Manawa, now is the moment of power.
To be present. BE HERE NOW.
And perhaps that sounds simple.
But presence is not always easy.
It is a practice, a returning, again and again, back to your body, back to your breath, back to this moment, because this moment is the only place where we can actually meet our lives.
A little practice
The next time you notice your mind moving into the past or rushing ahead into the future, pause.
Take a slow inhale.
And notice:
One thing you can feel.
One thing you can hear.
And then simply ask yourself:
What is happening right now?
You don’t need to change anything.
You don’t need to fix anything.
Just notice.
Take one more slow breath.
And come back to where you are.
Right here.
Right now.
Three prompts to sit with this week
1. Where is my attention being pulled?
Notice where your mind goes when you are not fully present.
2. What am I trying to hurry past?
Is there something in this moment, season or feeling that you are resisting?
3. What would it mean to be fully present here?
Not tomorrow. Not when things are different. What would presence look like right now?
Presence is not about getting it right all the time.
It is about noticing when you have left the moment and gently coming back.
Again and again.
Because so much of life is happening right here.
And perhaps the invitation is simply to be here for it.
Perhaps this is your invitation to slow down, come back to yourself, and create a little more space for what really matters.
Through my work with women in pregnancy, postpartum and all the seasons of womanhood, I offer a space to pause, be supported and reconnect with yourself.
If you feel ready for less doing and more being, I would love to work with you.
Theoni